Success—an enigmatic and multifaced concept. We yearn for it, strive for it, and yet, it can be illusive, often acting more like a moving target than a destination. The quest for success, whether personal or professional can be consuming, arduous, and no doubt elusive.
THE COMPLEXITY OF SUCCESS
What a complicated and confusing word “success” can be:
“Success, I finally got even with that guy.”
“I was successful in getting my dream job.”
“We finally succeeded in firing her.”
“The operation was a success.”
“We were successful in saving the pristine wetland area from destruction.”
“We were successful in getting a permit to build on the wetland.”
“He was successful in deceiving everyone.”
“What a successful life she lived, full of love and caring for others.”
Success is generally defined as accomplishing an aim or purpose in life. It is a concept that varies widely depending individual values, objectives, and aspirations. It can be measured in many ways such as financial security, career achievement, personal development, social acceptance, self-assurance, enlightenment, or the experience of love. Success can encompass prosperity, completion, victory, payback, or acceptance. It might be peace, physical or mental dominance, action, compromise, or continued learning.
Success is not exclusively characterized as the completion of a task. It can also be a gauge of our progress towards our overarching life ambitions.
RECOGNIZING SUCCESS
She was beautiful, over six feet tall and sported a delightful mixture of Spanish and Roma (Gypsy) blood. Born in 1892 in Sevenoaks, England, she lived a lifestyle as unique as her name, Vita Sackville-West. She grew up in the family estate, the Calendar House in Kent that had 365 rooms, one for each day of the year. She was loaded with both talent and money, although she never measured success by material wealth.
By age 18 Vita Sackville-West had authored eight books and several plays in different languages. She was fluent in English, Italian and French. Vita Sackville-West described her formula for successful living in old age even as she feared growing old herself. She wrote:
“It is necessary to write, if the days are not to slip emptily by. How else, indeed, to clap the net over the butterfly of the moment?”
Her beautiful poetic words directed her readers, myself included, to examine what was important in daily living as we age. What is it that brings value to our lives now that we are older, empty nesters, retired, and have experienced loss and limited physical abilities? To begin with, all of us need more than just our days slipping emptily by. Success captures “the butterfly of the moment.”
Countless strategies that have been utilized over time to achieve and sustain a successful lifestyle. Some of the most effective examples include:
- Set clear and specific goals to provide direction and focus.
- Continued learning to expand knowledge and adapt to new challenges.
- Believe in yourself when facing tough issues.
- Stay persistent realizing success may take time.
- Celebrate accomplishments acknowledging there are many triumphs on the road to an ultimate goal.
- Learn from failures and refine strategies.
Vita Sackville-West guides us to a strategy that encompasses the sub strategies listed above. The overriding strategy that leads to successful living is catching the butterfly in our net each day. Success does not stagnate, rest on past achievement, but uses each end as a means to the next goal in life. Success is an ongoing process.
As we age success is increasingly measured in small ways. Quality success may be found in writing, quiet time at the beach or in the mountains, cooking a fine meal, walking the dog, painting, hugging a grandchild, getting lost in music, reflecting on times pasts, sharing thoughts with a friend, reflective time alone, or a multitude of other options that are available. There may be times when the butterfly is finding the strength to go through a difficult period. Regardless of our personal situation or limitation we can find the “butterfly of the moment” that speaks to our need for successful expression. Or we can always choose to let the days “emptily slip by.”
THE CONTEXT FOR SUCCESS
The song What a Wonderful World was written by a team of jazz producers and recorded by Louie Armstrong in 1967. It was a number one hit in the U.K. in the 1960s. Italy placed it in the top 20 during the 1970s. It went unappreciated in the United States until the 1980s when its popularity soared. The iconic song provides a wonderful attitudinal context in which to recognize there is a butterfly to be caught in each and every day regardless of our circumstances.
“I see trees of green,
red roses too.
I see them bloom
for me and you
And I think to myself
what a wonderful world.”
EXPANDING HORIZONS
Casting our net each day provides insight and strength for what may lie ahead. As Perry Como sang so many years ago,
“Catch a falling star and put it in your pocket. Never let it fade away…save it for a rainy day.”
We travel down the road of life knowing what lies behind but unclear as to what is ahead. Even in our hardest times the butterfly of the moment can provide strength, understanding, and direction for the morrow. It is in the valued moments of everyday living that we experience life’s greatest successes.
Returning to the words of an aging Vita Sackville-West:
“Growth is exciting, growth is dynamic, and alarming. Growth of the soul, growth of the mind.”
Personal growth is an essential ingredient to ongoing successful living.
Vita Sackville-West was perhaps best known for her articles on gardening. One example of her writing:
“The other day I encountered a gentleman wearing amber-colored spectacles.”
The gentleman let Vita try on his spectacles and she observed:
“The old favorite rose, Zepyrine Drouhin, perfect in scent, vigorous in growth, magnificent in floraison…. (However) I have always deplored the crude pink of her complexion….’’
Seen through her new friend’s magic glasses, the rose’s bloom turned into
“Copper orange; burnished; incredible.”
We all have changes of mind and personal growth as we navigate through changing relationships and diverse events. Shifts in our perspectives are common place. As we age, may we embrace the transformations that challenge and enrich our lives, infusing us with boldness as they reveal the beauty and strength in everyday moments.
In this wonderful world, we cast our nets and sometimes catch a butterfly or a falling star to tuck away for a rainy day.
Written by: Hartzell Cobbs
About the Author: With a sprinkling of exuberance and vitality, Dr. Cobbs is an accomplished author of three books and numerous articles published in different venues throughout his life. Dr. Cobbs’ first book, Thanatos and the Sage: A spiritual approach to aging (2008), offers a thought-provoking interpretation of the interplay between how to live life with meaningful intentions and the eventuality of coming to terms with death. His second book, RavenWind (2019) delves into the raven’s role as it relates to Native American myths, legends, and folktales and global history. His reflections on the spirituality of living and dying depicted in his books are threaded throughout the short essays posted on the website for “Smart Strategies for Successful Living” and in his latest book, The Moon at the Window: Senior Reflections.
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The Moon at the Window: Senior Reflections: CLICK HERE.
RavenWind: CLICK HERE.
Thanatos and the Sage: A spiritual approach to aging: CLICK HERE.
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