When you’re in the middle of a relationship problem, it’s natural to feel like you’re all alone and that no one around you has ever experienced the pain, worry, or frustration you’re experiencing. After all, aren’t social media, movies, and advertising filled with happy, loving couples who never seem to experience relationship discord or marital disharmony? The fact is, relationship problems are very common, and as uncomfortable as they might be, there are proven, effective solutions that can help you and your partner overcome the difficulties and get back to a place where you’re happy and healthy. Here are five of the most common relationship problems and what you can do to tackle them.
1. You Feel Like the Relationship is No Longer a Priority
While couples need to maintain individual hobbies and social connections, it can feel like the relationship is no longer a priority if you’re spending too much time apart. Relationship “drift” can be dangerous, so you want to ensure that you are still spending time together regardless of business schedules and family demands. Concentrate on little things you can do every day, like taking a walk after dinner, staying in on Saturday night and cooking a meal together, or spending an afternoon doing something you both enjoyed in the early days of your relationship.
2. You Feel Like Your Trust is Eroding
Whether romantic, friendship, family, or work, every important relationship has to be based on trust. If you feel that level of trust is eroding, getting to the heart of the problem is the only way to keep your connection strong. This situation is challenging but necessary for couples who have experienced a breach of trust, such as infidelity, lying about behaviors, lack of commitment, or holding on to prior traumas. Rebuilding trust and then keeping it strong takes time and serious effort, and for this, couples therapy is very successful.
3. You Feel Like You’re Not Communicating Anymore
Honest and open communication is what makes a good relationship. Even if you’re not entirely comfortable talking about your emotions or needs, it’s essential for the long-term health of the relationship. Face-to-face conversations about sensitive subjects can be challenging, and it might be tempting to avoid them and use text messages, emails, or phone calls instead. However, these other methods frequently lead to further miscommunication and misunderstandings and can cause problems to worsen. If you truly value the relationship, serious communications need to happen in person.
4. You Feel Like Your Sex Life Has Become an Afterthought
Sex and physical intimacy are important components of any romantic relationship, and they help keep your emotional connection strong. However, as time passes and the relationship becomes more familiar, it’s common for sex to become less frequent. And if you have children, a busy work schedule, or other family demands, fantasizing about a “good night’s sleep” can take the place of a super-steamy sexual escapade! Furthermore, as couples get older, it’s common for both men and women to feel less attractive or desirable, which can significantly impact the desire to have sex. There are two easy solutions to these problems. The first is to make time for sex. Plan a date night, book a babysitter (and maybe even a hotel room) and relive the fun times when your relationship was new. The second solution is to offer sincere compliments to your partner. For example, what you like about their eyes or smile, how sexy they look after working out, or how proud you feel when you see them reading a bedtime story to the kids. Sincere compliments can make your partner feel beautiful and desired, which makes it easier to light a spark!
5. You Worry About Financial Issues
Financial compatibility can be a huge problem in relationships. For example, if one partner is a saver while the other is a spender, creating good financial communication and adopting policies to help both of you compromise and feel comfortable is essential. In addition, being open to honest communication will help you navigate financial decisions with greater ease.
Is There ANY Good News About Relationships?
Yes! The good news is that there is a body of research showing what makes good relationships so good. Recently published in the Proceedings of the National Academy of Sciences, this research shows that the secret to a satisfying relationship often hinges on each person’s opinion of the relationship. This is because the view you hold of your relationship impacts how you engage with your partner, and how you engage with your partner impacts communication, trust, intimate desire, and comfort level. Researchers discovered that a happy relationship is less about picking the “perfect” partner but more about appreciating the partnership you have. When tackling any of the most common relationship problems, make sure you’re taking time to value and enjoy one another as part of your healing journey.
Written by: Aaron Smith
Aaron Smith is an LA-based content strategist and consultant in support of STEM firms and medical practices. He covers industry developments and helps companies connect with clients. In his free time, Aaron enjoys swimming, swing dancing, and sci-fi novels.
